Tuesday, September 29, 2009

I am Hurting!

Posted by twinx at 5:10 PM 1 comments

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As I watched the news, my heart bleeds for those who were affected by Ondoy. However, as my day ended, I realized that I should be more sympathetic to those who regard themselves as JUDGES of the acts of others... I am not supposed to explain myself to others since I am not accountable to them... But, I am hurting! This post is intended for those who talked badly behind my back, those who judged me but couldn't even face me, to those who have hurt me today...

I have thought for a million times if I was to be blamed for a decision that had changed several lives, including my own. In my opinion, it was a WIN-WIN decision... Did you know that the entity is losing? or You have never thought of it because you still receive your paychecks even if you did not work... Had you shown compassion to the company? You could not even master your work! All that matters to you is being compensated for your STAY in the office regardless of your mistakes... You have no right to accuse me of dishonesty... I was able to take multiple jobs to provide the needs of my family. That's in addition to the salary of my spouse and the daily income of our small business. How dare you charge me with an offense that is so linked with you?!! or should I remind you that I'm not the needy one? I don't boast what I have, but I do not live beyond my means.

When my family member was hospitalized, did you show some concern?... or You just speculated on the worst reason for her admission?! Had you known that she intended to take her life away, would you be sorry? Well, I suppose that you may feel sorry for her then put the blame on another people. That's what you're good at, right? You can't just compare her with other sluts out there. You have not endured her plight... She may had been misguided but she's not different from some girls who live with their parents. There are actually some parents who looked at their children so perfectly that they even fight for their wrongdoings. We accept criticisms, we encourage suggestions on how to deal with her... How about you? Can we make a comment about your child?

Your immature talks keep me wondering on how PERFECT your life is since you really have the nerve to say such things about other people. I abominate your capability to curse us and what we do. I loathe your inability to be simply happy for us. I abhor your blindness to see the good things that we had done to you. I disgust the fact that we belong on the same family.

You don't really know me well to judge me... My life is absolutely not perfect... I had made mistakes, horrible mistakes.. I had affected some lives and I felt so sorry for it. Besides, all my mistakes had greatly impacted myself... I blamed no one, I faced all the consequences... And I learned from all the experiences that I went through.

If there are changes in your lives, you cannot overcome it by putting the blame on other people. Why not contemplate on how to move on?! Just accept that truth that you can't just rely on other people for the rest of your life.

Lastly, I am not frequent church-goer... but, as much as possible, I obey what is written on the Bible... That goes with learning to love all of you after what happened! The Bible says to Love my Enemies... In the end, even though how bad you thought or said about me, that will not really matter... I am only accountable to God and not to all of you!!!

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